Lesson #2: People are going to change.

One of the saddest truths I've had to accept in life is this one: people change. We grow up and grow apart. We have different backgrounds that will lead us to see different perspectives that will ultimately challenge our fluidity with one another. Your parents will change; your siblings will change; your best friends will change. To themselves, they're just finding out more and more of who they are. To you, they're changing and that's okay because they're going to be seeing you differently, too. You're changing along with everyone else around you, even if you don't acknowledge it. 

It's easy to say that someone is being a hypocrite or that they're "different than they were", but it's also easy to justify your own actions that would make you seem hypocritical and different. I can honestly say that I am not the same cheeky kid I was at the far right of this picture. But, I'm not different than that kid, either. I'm figuring out what I want, how to get there, and to enjoy the journey while I'm at it. 

It honestly doesn't matter how many pictures I post on here. I will be a different variation of the same person in each and every single one of them. Every day I change as a person: my perspective, my drive, my ambitions, hopes and dreams are changing just as rapidly as the weather in Ohio does. 

A lot of friendships end because we anchor one another to our past actions. Which isn't okay. We're living proof of our pasts, but that doesn't mean we want those decisions, moments and memories to forever define who we are and where we want to be or are heading. An addict who went to rehab will not want to be known forever as that person whose life depended upon whether or not they got that fix. They want to be remembered for each moment they made someone laugh, for each second they made someone smile, for each day they inspired someone to be a better person. And let's be honest, don't we all want that? 

There are experiences in my life that I will never share with friends, that I won't have to look into my future husband's eyes and tell him of the shame or guilt. But there are also moments that my friends won't have to tell their future boyfriends or girlfriends, because they never lived through those same times. I've had friends who said they'd never do drugs, who, eventually, did drugs and still do. Friends who swore they would never drink or use tobacco products. Friends who were terrified of tattoos and piercings or saw people who were decorated with ink and metal and thought of how disgusting those people are. But those friends went and smoked, chewed, drank, got tattooed and pierced. And that's okay because those decisions lie solely on their shoulders and not mine. And those experiences will change how they see things. 

And while I'll never share those experiences or understand how their perspectives have changed, I have undergone things that they'll never get. My closest friends have never gone through a depression or sank so far into themselves that they felt trapped and lost and worthless. My closest high school friends don't know what it's like to be a part of a co-ed fraternity or be in a sorority. They have no idea what it's like to be surrounded by the most amazing, loud, Italian family like mine. They don't know what it's like to struggle with the things I've struggled, but they also don't know what it's like to get out of those same struggles and see just how beautiful your life is. 

Yeah, I've changed. And yeah, my friends have changed. I've watched my brothers and sisters change and my parents change. But never complain about it. It's like that saying, "Be kind for everyone you meet is facing their own battles." Don't judge someone for the actions or for having a new perspective because you don't know just what they've gone through in their life. There's a reason why they hate the color blue  or are terrified of goats. There's a reason they decided to get alchemy symbols tattooed onto their forearm. And believe it or not, there's a reason for everything and every decision someone decides upon doing. So, let them have those moments. You may not agree with them, but they probably don't agree on everything you decide to do. 

It's okay to change and to watch others change, as long as you embrace them for who they are as a person and for where they're going and help to promote self-awareness and self-confidence. As long as you help them to get from point A to point B in a positive and healthy manner. As long as you're promoting and not destroying, it's okay to change. It's the saddest truth I've ever had to accept, but it's also the most beautiful because once you learn to accept it, you begin to understand a lot more than you thought you would.